Lou Ann (Rhodes) Starkey

Two students at West Virginia University are introduced by their landladies because they thought they would be perfect for each other. We are thankful to them. Jim was a senior, a business major and athlete, football, basketball and track as well ROTC. Lou Ann was finishing her master’s degree in social work. An accomplishment for a woman in the mid-fifties that was not common. They were both from small towns, Circleville Ohio and Charleston West Virginia. While Charleston is not a small town, Lou Ann had roots in Spenser West Virginia. Many of her fondest memories were there. Spending time with her Grandpa Burdette who she adored, movies, picnics and roaming those green hills to find the ponies that they rode bareback out at the farm on Route 33.

After graduating from Stonewall Jackson High School back in Charleston, she studied at Morris Harvey College before pursuing her master’s. Which brings us back to Morgantown.

Jim and Lou Ann’s first date was the ROTC ball. The Tommy Dorsey orchestra was playing the ball and you can well imagine it was magical. Jim in his full dress uniform and Lou Ann in a flowing dress. Perhaps love at first sight or love at first dance and they danced the night away. getting to know each other, laughing and falling in love.

She didn’t date Jim because he was an athlete. Not even sure she saw him play ball, but there was an attraction and spark.

Soon after graduation, Jim headed off to Korea as a lieutenant and played for the army all-star football team and Lou Ann took a job in Cincinnati. During Jim’s time in Korea he wrote her everyday, letters that she kept her entire life.

On Valentine’s Day in 1955 he wrote “I think of you constantly and I am now firmly convinced that this is not just infatuation, but you are the one I love and I would like to have forever.” He continued. “ I guess I really tell on myself when I write you a letter in relating to you just how I feel , but that is all I have on my mind so consequently that is what my hand writes”.

In December of 55 he had an injury and he wrote “Today if I get in the game, I am going to imagine that you are in the stands watching and everything I do will be for the girl I love sitting in the bleachers”.

There was competition of course, after all she was a catch, the total package. Beauty, brains and a gentle personality and oh yea…those blue eyes. They sparkled when she laughed. In another letter he writes. “ I guess it will be a couple of years now before I get married because there is no trying to win a girl through letters when someone is right there constantly knocking

on the door”. In order to win his girl, he proposed by sending a letter and a ring. She accepted of course.

In October of 56 just before coming home he writes “ Darling, you can bet your life that when you become Mrs. Starkey it will be the happiest day of my life”

When he returned he brought with him a bottle of Chanel #5, which became her fragrance of choice.

Jim and Lou Ann got married in December of 56 in Charleston and got off to a glamorous start. They took a brief honeymoon in exotic Pittsburg and then moved to Kentucky and lived in a trailer behind the liquor store before they moved to Minneapolis where Brian was born. Following there were a couple different stops including Cincinnati where Mary was born and Kent. Ann was born in Ravenna.

The couple, settled on Greenwood Avenue where they would raise their children for the next several years. They were members of Christ United Methodist Church. Jim worked for BF Goodrich and Lou Ann was a stay at home mother.

In 1967 Jim was diagnosed with kidney disease and the family moved to Circleville and spent some time on small farm in Laurelville. Jim always wanted a farm. In 1968 they returned to Akron and Jim passed away. There was never another true romance in her life. Her father also passed away that year.

This is where the caring nature and strength of Lou Ann starts to reveal itself. Shortly after Jim’s passing she took her children to Blossom to hear the Cleveland Orchestra. Following that evening she wrote a letter to the Beacon Journal about the experience and its meaning to her and her family. The same letter was reprinted on the 50th anniversary of Blossom.

She began her career as a social worker working for Summit County and the Children’s Home where she retired having impacted the lives of children all over Summit County. To refer to her as a care giver doesn’t really capture it. Over her life she supported her children in every way. They wanted for nothing especially love and support. She took in her niece, her granddaughter, friends of her children and grandchildren when they needed help.

What was important to her was family, faith and friends in addition to her work. She was kind, compassionate, accepting and faithful. She never wore her faith on her sleeve choosing to follow the teachings of Jesus in her way and as an example to the rest of us.

She went to Louisiana after a hurricane just because she thought she could help.

Church was central to her life and her church community supported her throughout. There she made friends for life, Lenore, Jean, Kaye, Evelyn, Bill, Mac and too many more to name. It was divine intervention that brought her and Lenore together. They met in Sunday School class.

They had both lost their husbands and both had 3 children the exact same ages. The families became friends and spent many vacations, holidays, events together and of course church. She kept friends for life. She and her friend Sue from West Virginia were friends since they were 8.

Frank was her guy when it came to music. He may have been singing with Dorsey that night at the ROTC ball. Basie, Ella, Brubeck, Glen Miller. She also liked Herb Alpert and Al Hirt but was not a big fan of Elvis.

MASH was her show and she like stories told by Kuralt and Keillor. The first president she voted for was Eisenhower but later became a democrat. Pecan pie, ice cream, and chocolate. She was a fan of Van Gogh.

Family was first and travel important. She made sure her children and grandchildren saw the country and the world, different cultures, and experiences. 3 kids in the back of a blue ( her favorite color) ford LTD station wagon they traveled to national parks, historic sites and everything in between. That took spunk. In 1974 she took her children to Europe for a month seeing all the classic sites.

She created a 4-generation household when her daughter, Samantha and Jim moved back to Akron and took in her mother in her final years.

When it came time for her children to go to college, they had a choice, but no Akron U or Kent State. She wanted them to go away to school and have that life experience.

Like any other children there were moments, especially with Brian but her love was unconditional, her support boundless, and her spirit undeterred. She never let on to the kids when something was troubling her. She kept harm from her family.

She was also blessed with 5 grandchildren, Eli, Samantha, Jim, Benjamin and Laura and now Riley her great granddaughter. Riley brought her so much joy this past October. She is so proud of all of them.

Some may say she had a rough road with 3 kids and being a single working mom and some of that is certainly true, but there was a lot of joy throughout her life. Her childhood, college, her children, grandchildren and now great grandchildren. The joy she gave to others and those 12 precious years with Jim.

She leaves behind her son Brian and Lisa, daughter Ann and John, daughter Mary, grandson Eli and Allison, granddaughter Samantha and Mikobi, grandson Benjamin and Kayla, Jim, and Laura.

While she will be missed every day, she now has peace and has been reunited with other family members, friends and Jim.

Hers is a life to be celebrated, to be admired and to be used as an example of how we conduct our lives. The best way to honor her is to tap into those lessons she taught us, to use her example in our actions and deeds, emulate her compassion and kindness. To keep family first, trust in the creator, and keep our friends close.

We can only hope to be the person she was and try as best we can to follow in her footsteps. To never give up even if your heart is broken, you lose your way, or face hardships.

Now after 92 years of a wonderful life, Lou Ann’s work on this planet is done. Through joy and sadness, disappointment and triumph, laughter and tears, friends made and friends lost, hills to climb, challenges to face and a hard-fought battle….. she is at peace.

The recent eclipse reminds us of the wonders of nature, the mystery of a higher power and that there are things still not completely understood. While her being gone might be hard to understand and adjust to, we have those memories, lessons, love, and compassion to lean on. Draw on those as you find yourself missing her and think about the fact that she is surrounded by family and remember that after a long wait, her and Jim are dancing again and this time the music will never stop.